I feel like no one respects my time or what I need to do. Nobody cares that my kids didn’t get a summer break. Nobody cares that they don’t have what they need for school Friday. Nobody cares that my house and belongings are being destroyed daily. And I’m sure this will make people pissed as hell, but this is how I feel currently, and it is so upsetting. This used to be a world that reached out and helped each other, and it’s just not anymore. I don’t know what happened, but I’m just not seeing the same brotherly or sisterly love. When you took someone a hot meal bc they are struggling. Or you ask if they need a break. I’m not even seeing that from my own family, and I’m sorry to complain but enough is enough. I’m just tired. I FEEL LIKE NOBODY GIVES A DAMN. THIS IS A SELFISH SELFISH WORLD, AND MAYBE I’M SELFISH TOO, BUT IT IS WHAT IT IS. I’M JUST DONE BEING NICE AND TAKING IT. BUT I’M SURE I’LL DO IT ANYWAY. ****sigh****
And just wanted to mention that I have some wonderful supportive friends and family, and I’m certainly not talking about them. We also had a remarkable outpouring of support when my dad died, and we were so appreciative of that. I know people have their own busy lives and small bank accounts so I’m not expecting to be catered to. It just seems like everyone has disappeared….. And “it’s the thought that counts” is more than a phrase. It truly does mean the world. Even a simple phone call. That’s all I’m saying.
I don’t think I’ll be going to Walmart by myself again. The whole time I’m like a damsel in distress. I went today bc we needed more groceries and my back is doing so much better. Shopping is okay for the most part, but checking out is awful. Luckily I had a gracious and patient cashier who kindly packed the basket for me. The baskets on scooters don’t hold as much as buggies, so I was loaded down. Then get out to the parking lot, struggling to keep things from falling. The woman at the homeless vet table asks for a donation, I have no choice but to ignore her bc I’ve got one hand on the steering “wheel” & the other on my bag of bread about to fly away, & I’m looking straight ahead so I can see, then karma smacks me & my bread jumps in the air, I try to catch it, & my mile long receipt flitters away. So I have now littered in front of the woman! Then I juggle the bread and eggs till I get to the car. Well my remote decides not to work. So I’m struggling to find the trunk key, then It won’t work either! I finally get it, then pack the car for 10 mins. A nice girl asked if she could help, but I was almost done then. So as I’m parking the scooter, the cart guy runs up to me bc apparently the vet lady or somebody managed to wrangle my receipt in the wind, so he hands it to me. I awkwardly laugh & thank him, get in the car, which will not crank. So I try over and over and over. My car does this bc he’s a very moody car. I try to motivate him & give him a pep talk (his name is George), but he’s not having it today. It’s not, it’s gross, I can’t breathe, & I’m stranded with a trunk full of meat. So, as I said before, the remote wouldn’t work. Well neither will the hood pop open, bc when George throws tantrums, he totally shuts down! So, I’m trying to wait til he has calmed down, embarrassed and contemplating what to do. Then the sweet little cart guy comes back, and offers assistance. He had to hang on the hood a few times & finally George opened up! I explained that all it takes is jiggling the battery cables a couple of times. He did that, and then it cranked right up! Naughty George! Shame on you! I thanked the guy for his service, and finally was able to go home! So that’s my Walmart hell story of the day. & why I’m never going back alone! I do much better when I can use my kids as an excuse for my chaos! 😂😂😂😂
#shoppingwhiledisabled #imanawkwardwalmartshopper #whydoesgeorgedothistome
One of the biggest challenges secondary to managing your lymohedema is finding shoes that actually fit and are affordable. A little style would be nice too. But beggars can’t be choosers, right? And I feel like living a life with lymphedema, I am begging enough. So I will continue to beg… New Balance, please I beg of you, make wide widths available for customization!
If you haven’t seen it, the new option for customizing on the New Balance site is awesome! But some shoes are only available in wide, some in 2E. I unfortunately wear a 6E, in men’s. I had challenges before lymphedema, being flat footed with wide feet, unknowingly affected with lipedema. I struggled to find female shoes that were wide enough. After struggling for cute shoes in Jr high, I gave up the fight and resigned to the fact that I would only ever be able to wear tennis shoes comfortably. Nothing cute, no sandals. And my feet only continued to grow. I wore my last female sneaker about three years before developing lymphedema. I then started wearing 2E widths in men’s New Balance. I was so happy to find a larger width that I didn’t even care about how they looked (they were plain black. Nothing fancy at all).
After I developed LE, I had to move to a 4e. And I can’t tell you how happy I was to find out that there was such a thing! I believe it was my dad who told me, and I was amazed. Eventually, I graduated to a 6E, and that’s okay too. As long as I can find shoes to fit my feet, I don’t mind the size. I urge anyone who has issues with finding shoes, look into new balance. A good pair of shoes can save your feet, legs, & life! Unfortunately 6E is as wide as it gets, and they usually must be bought online, but it can be done & in just so grateful to New Balance for providing larger footwear. Good for you, www.newbalance.com.
Here is another link that could help, if you have the ultimate devil of foot pain, Plantar Fasciitis! I do, and it’s agony! BTW, I think I’m supposed to mention that I don’t get paid when you click on these sites. I’m just being nice 😆
I think anyone who has gone through this likely knows, having a sick parent is the worst of the worst (right after having a sick kid). My mom had diverticulitis. Now knowing what I know about this condition, I knew it was more serious than she or her doctors were making it out to be. Well I guess I should have said something, bc it got abscessed and her colon perfed. She had emergency surgery, which was grueling on us, bc her myasthenia Gravis only complicated things, and then when she woke up, we found out that the Dr left the incision wide open!! 😬
One of worst parts of chronic illness is fatigue. And this seems to be a common ailment , no matter the condition. It all comes down to how much energy you are able to use before your next nap. I have seen people go a full day without recharging their batteries. And this always amazes me. My mother, for instance, does not usually take naps unless it’s a weekend. She wakes up at 6am and works a full day. Then she just keeps going like the energizer bunny. A slow one; but nevertheless, she doesn’t stop. At the end of the day, it is obvious my mother is exhausted. But she still stays up till about 10pm, if not later.
I cannot even fathom how to do that. If something were to come up, and I had to, there would likely be a moment of snoozng in there. Even if I had to do it in ten minute intervals. That’s the thing about chronic illness. It never stops beating you down and wearing you out. those of us who are more susceptible to fatigue than others can be very misunderstood by the average human.
Many of us with chronic illness and fatigue are labeled as lazy or unmotivated. That usually isn’t the case at all! There are TONS of things I want to do with my life! I’ve always been a big dreamer, and I’ve always been very motivated to achieve these things. Like somehow, it will all work out and I’ll get where I want to go. However, I made some bad decisions in college, and didn’t go down the planned path at all. Now, two kids later, and a debilitating disability, I don’t know if I’ll ever do those things.
I admit, I loved to sleep before I developed lymphedema. I probably could be referred to as a little lazy. Maybe a lot lazy on the weekends. And I was always have been overweight with hypothyroidism, which doesn’t help at all with fatigue and energy levels. But I got done what needed to be done, for the most part. I worked a full time job. I walked and exercised at times, even though I didn’t love doing it. Looking back, I would definitely move more. I’d walk down the street more and see nature. I would enjoy the ability to do these things. But that’s the thing about hindsight.
I admit-I miss Sasha like hell! Already! My daughter and I were fortunate to meet Sonequa Martin-Greene in Atlanta last year. She was soooooo friendly. She gushed over my daughter bc she’s a huge fan! Sonequa has a dazzling smile and her presence just hypnotizes you! I do hope she will still be able to attend WSC ATL despite her new role.
Losing her on TWD was a huge deal to me. I adored her character. I felt the pain when she lost Bob but especially when she lost Tyreese. This is another reason it’s a big deal. Tyreese’s death was one of the absolute worse for me. His episode was so beautiful. Greg Nicotero did such a wonderful job in directing it! I couldn’t have asked for better. The music was the kind that burns into your skull, and it did burn right into mine. I hear that music and burst into tears! Thanks for that, Bear McCreary. Beautiful music! But incredibly sad.
Back to Sasha. Watching her over the years break and grow, break and grow again, has been heart – wrenching. Then to watch Abraham fall in love with her really overjoyed me. And for them to lose that love so quickly – oh, Gimple, you’re killing me! I’m so glad the writers handled it the way that they did though. Bringing Abraham back in the flashback brought tears to my eyes! I’m so glad they addressed the question of why they did this to us and to our new favorite couple!!!! Just doesn’t seem fair, but that’s life. Especially in a zombie apocalypse. Farewell, Sasha. You kicked ass coming out of that casket the way you did! Abraham would have loved it! #twd #sonequamartingreen #sasha
My little Sasha ❤️
I don’t think I could possibly sum it up any better than Abraham or Maggie did! But wow, what an amazing show! Awesome writing, Scott Gimple! Awesome directing, Nicotero! And great acting from the cast! Loooooooved it! And the majority of it had me in tears, particularly the end!!!! Can’t stop crying! #thewalkingdead #twd